loving this

thinking...pensively...

read this quote on a friend's page today:

"Wait for the boy who will make an ordinary moment seem magical, the kinda boy who brings out the best in you and makes you wanna be a better person, wait for the boy who will be your best friend, who will drop everything to be with you at any time no matter what the circumstances, wait for the boy who makes you smile like no one else and when he smiles you know he needs you, wait for the boy who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats and have no make-up on, but appreciates it when you get dolled up for him...and most of all wait for the boy who will put you at the center of his universe because that's where you belong."

so finally ready for this...and yet so dreadfully scared of this. the last time i thought i had this, it didn't go over so well. (but let's face it...it wasn't actually like that). so hopefully the next time will be better.

Wonderful (favorite lyrics right now)

the person that you were has died

you've lost the sparkle in your eyes

you fell for life into its traps

and now you want to bridge the gaps

now you want to bridge the gaps

now you want that person back

and all your ammunition's gone

ran out of fuel to carry on

you don't know what you want to do

you've got no pull to pull you through

say i am

say i am

say i am wonderful

say i am

say i am

say i am wonderful

If what you've lost cannot be found

and the weight of the world weighs you down

no longer with the will to fly

you stop to let it pass you by

don't stop to let it pass you by

you've got to look yourself in the eye

say i am

say i am

say i am wonderful

say i am

say i am

say i am wonderful

cause we are all miracles

wrapped up in chemicals

we are incredible

don't take it for granted, no

we are all miracles

oh we are

say i am

say i am

say i am wonderful.

-gary go "wonderful"

Another Testament Trailer from Reflections of Christ on Vimeo.

Imperfect Reflection

slow down

deep breaths

you're moving too fast,

got your foot stuck on the gas

you're trapped in

a stained glass cage

one wrong move,

and you'll be covered in glass

and I'm feeling

you building walls

all around

and you know that

you're bound to fall

if you keep gracing the edge

i know cause i've been to where you are

where you are

you used to care but now you're just worried

so you start living life in a hurry

rushin ahead to pass by the mirror

hopin someday you'll see yourself clearer

why don't you tamper with your perfection

and learn to love your imperfect reflection

what you eat

comes right out your mouth

so tell me

what is that all about

it's saddening to come to this

but you insist

on a quick fix

from softening

to maddening

it's one extreme to the next

and your defense

is that you

ain't hurting no one

but yourself.

but when you're down you're not alone

not alone

you used to care but now you're just worried

so you start living life in a hurry

rushin ahead to pass by the mirror

hopin someday you'll see yourself clearer

why don't you tamper with your perfection

and learn to love your imperfect reflection

let go

let go

let go

let go

you're beautiful

you're beautiful

you're beautiful just the way you are

you are.

(c) 2009

Claire and Benson

I saw this today and I cried. Someone so young and innocent has to go through this everyday. It makes me realize how blessed I am to be healthy.



You can go to their blog here.

I submit that this is going to be good.

really good.

if you're an engineer/arranger/songwriter/musician/artist/singer/composer/producer/lover of music... this should blow your mind. and if it doesn't...your mind should be blown..into a million pieces. the end.

i love...

• buying new music on itunes (recent purchases: shae fiol--catch a falling star, owl city--fuzzy blue lights, Ingrid Michaelson-the chain, Jason Mraz--if it kills me, MSTRKRFT ft. John Legend--heartbreaker...)
• putting that music into playlists (current playlists: "summer nights", "february")
• bubble baths with my pecan pie delight bubble soak
• spending hours working on a recording and enjoying the creative process
• listening to Jeff Buckley's version of "Hallelujah"---especially while enjoying my soak in pecan pie
• day-dreaming
• writing new songs and the catharsis that ensues
• shopping at the local farmer's market with all of the old people... the place has been open for over 50 years and its customers have been faithful
• cooking...but not just cooking, creating something original that's nothing short of magical to the senses and all made out of fresh grown ingredients from the local market or my mom's garden (my parent's are A-ok with this passion of mine...and reap its benefits often)
• the gospel and being reminded of my potential and reinforcement of truth every week
• one word: dessert
• really great workouts...running and losing track of time
• playing the piano and losing track of time
• being able to drive to San Diego in half a day...which I did twice last week.
• having finally figured out that life is a process...a journey...it takes the guilt out of things. mistakes don't count as points against you. there is no regrettable past or uneasy future. just always moving forward and learning as you go.
• learning to respect my body and heal our negative relationship. body...you have a lot to offer me. i'm glad i have you.
• friends coming home from missions. sisters moving home.
• my brother, his wife, and my nephew...and the little one coming in April.
• james mcavoy, john mayer and johnny depp....all of my celebrity loves start with a "j"...i guess.
• spider solitaire
• swimming in my pool that is at a constant 80-something degrees day or night..all by myself:)
• the FOOD network
• lotion (skin milk, love spell and white tea and ginger)
• dark chocolate
• seeing/hearing from old friends
• finding notes from old friends tucked away in my room
• love letters
• erasing my done "to do" items off my white board
• reading before bedtime
• going to sleep to the sound of the ocean
• sunsets over the ocean
• organizing my room (not done nearly enough)
• drinking tea in dim light with a good book or a great window view
• art...that makes me think without words
• strawberries
• cellos
• answered prayers and the revelation that God knows who I am and is listening
• walks
• parks
• city lights over water
• Alexi Murdoch, "Orange Sky"
• private dance parties in my room
• knowing that there is someone out there who will someday love all of these quirky things about me

I'm listening to...

www.shaefiol.net

myspace.com/shaefiol

details in the fabric...

calm down, deep breaths

and get yourself dressed instead

of running around

and pulling on your threads

and breaking yourself up

if it's a broken part replace it

if it's a broken arm then brace it

if it's a broken heart then face it

and

hold your own

know your name

and go your own way

hold your own

know your name

and go your own way

and everything

will be fine

hang on

help is on the way

stay strong

i'm doing everything.

hold your own

know your name

and go your own way

and everything

will be fine.